Matt Paknis Leadership Development

"Revenge and retaliation always perpetuate the cycle of anger, fear and violence." - Coretta Scott King "Fair-minded people avoid zero-sum games in which one-person's win translates into another person's loss." - Frank Sonnenberg "People will throw stones and hide their hands and then get back and play the victim." - August Alsina #fairness #justice #collaboration #winwin #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #love #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #freedom

Pictured clockwise around Dawkins, from lower left: my mom, Diane Bowen Paknis, in a 1957 College Graduation Photo, leading Rhythm Band at Vacation Bible School (I am in the red hat), with her children in a cherry tree at Branch Brook Park, Newark, NJ in 1968, watching the 1979 Madison Dodgers from our car, the last time she saw me play. Bryan Fennelly – photo credit.       Darryl Dawkins, aka Chocolate Thunder, first shattered an NBA Backboard with a thunderous dunk on November 13, 1979, the same day my mom died following her courageous eight-year battle with cancer. She was diagnosed with Stage IV Malignant Melanoma in 1971 when prognosis was five months. My brother was four, my sister was thirteen, and I was nine. A miracle, she lived eight years post-surgery, close to twenty times longer than expected.   After diagnosis, she underwent radical surgery, requiring over 2,000 stitches, to remove her infected lymph system. This left her with lymphedema, o...

"Walls keep everybody out. Boundaries teach them where the door is." - Mark Groves "Without boundaries in our lives we feel constant chaos. Almost like we're 'on call' for other people. This can lead to self-neglect." - Dr. Nicole LePera #boundaries #protection #safety #selfrespect #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #justice #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #freedom

"Strong people don't put others down... They lift them up." — Michael P. Watson Bullies tear others down.  Successful Leaders build them up.  "Weak people put others down. They attempt to crush them in spirit." — Annette Caldwell #strength #liftothersup #build #elevate #heal #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #freedom #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #justice #truth

"I shall not submit to injustice from anyone. I shall conquer untruth by truth." - Mahatma Gandhi "It is in justice that the ordering of society is centered." - Aristotle "There may be times when we are powerless to prevent injustice, but there must never be a time when we fail to protest."  - Elie Wiesel #truth #justice #protest #rights #freedom #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #speakout #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #protection

"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that." - Martin Luther King, Jr. "We must take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented." - Elie Wiesel #speakout #standup #shine #light #love #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #truth #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #freedom  People are afraid of the ramifications of dealing with the dark instead of celebrating the light. Silence encourages bullies. Expose all abuse.

"Unity to be real must stand the severest strain without breaking." - Mahatma Gandhi "We may have all come on different ships, but we're in the same boat now." - Martin Luther King, Jr. #unity #standup #common #goals #teamwork #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #trust #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #freedom

"To be a good leader, you have to have something in your character to cause people to follow you." - Jimmy Johnson "A lack of transparency results in distrust and a deep sense of insecurity." - Dalai Lama "The greatest act of courage is to be who you are — without masks to cover the truth of who you are." - Brené Brown #character #integrity #courage #transparency #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #truth #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #speakout

 

  Homer, or Paknis?😉 “When we seek to discover the best in others, we somehow bring out the best in ourselves.” - William Arthur Ward "Real leaders attack problems not people." - Colin Powell #seek #discover #talents #gifts #solutions  #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #decency #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #kindness  Bullies seek to find what’s “wrong” with people in their lives, rather than what’s right. They attack people, not problems.

"In a democracy, dissent is an act of faith." - James William Fulbright "We must not confuse dissent with disloyalty. When the loyal opposition dies, I think the soul of America dies with it." - Edward R. Murrow "May we never confuse honest dissent with disloyal subversion." - Dwight D. Eisenhower #freedom #dissent #loyalty #democracy #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #justice #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #peace  

"Defense mechanisms are ways our minds try to protect us from anxiety or threats to self-esteem." - Sigmund Freud "Bullying never has to do with you. It’s the bully who’s insecure." - Shay Mitchell "No one heals themself by wounding another." - St. Ambrose "The common mistake bullies make is assuming a nice person is also weak. Those traits have nothing to do with each other." - Mary Elizabeth Williams #protection #security #heal #bekind #strength #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #freedom #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #peace

"In a gentle way, you can shake the world. Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will." - Mahatma Gandhi "Every act of kindness, no matter how small, carries a quiet strength and a gentle grace." - Spirit of a Hippie  #begentle #kindness #strength #will #Grace #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #peace #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #decency  Bullies are weak and fragile, whereas good leaders are strong and tough. Strive to be the model of a good leader people want to see. There is strength in decency and kindness.

"We are only as strong as we are united, as weak as we are divided" - Atlassian. "At the end of the day, you can either focus on what's tearing you apart or what's keeping you together" - Eric Graham.  "Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?" - Henry David Thoreau #unity #strength #choices #Focus #together #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #eyes #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #peace

"Hate destroys, love builds. Fear closes, love opens. Anger takes, love gives." - Madelaine Standing "We rise by lifting others." - Robert Ingersoll "The broken humans of the world make the greatest healer." - Abhijit Naskar  #love #build #Open #giveaway #rise #lift #heal #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #hope #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #justice

"The great corporation which employed you lied to you, and lied to the whole country—from top to bottom it was nothing but one gigantic lie." - Upton Sinclair "Because power corrupts, society's demands for moral authority and character increase as the importance of the position increases." - John Adams #truth #utility #moral #character #hope #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #freedom #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #democracy

"If you are pained by external things, it is not they that disturb you, but your own judgment of them. And it is in your power to wipe out that judgement now." – Marcus Aurelius. "Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage." – Dale Carnegie #courage #action #protection #safety #peace #LeadersArentBullies # stopbullying #love #strength #HealthyWorkplaces #freedom   #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct    # psychologicalsafetyatworkact #standup #together Bullies plan their sneak attacks. They attempt to immobilize and control their victims with fear and unjustified criticism with unpredictable traps, dead-falls, and tricks.

"One nation, under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all." - Francis Bellamy "Alone we can do so little, together so much." — Helen Keller  "Individual commitment to a group effort—that is what makes a team work, a company work, a society work, a civilization work." — Vince Lombardi  "The common needs of many are more important than the needs of a few or one." - Vulcan Tenet #unity #together #collective #safety #peace #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #love #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #sacrifice

"Bullies need to feel superior. Displaying great talent while trying to please and impress a boss can result in the opposite - trigger fear and insecurity." - Robert Greene "A lack of transparency results in distrust and a deep sense of insecurity." - Dalai Lama "Most bad behavior comes from insecurity." - Debra Winger #competence #confidence #embrace #talent #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #peace #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #freedom

"I hope we shall crush in its birth the aristocracy of our monied corporations which dare already to challenge our government to a trial by strength, and bid defiance to the laws of our country." - Thomas Jefferson #justice #independence #safety #truth #rights #freedom #speech #FairTrial “Without strong watchdog institutions, impunity becomes the very foundation upon which systems of corruption are built. And if impunity is not demolished, all efforts to bring an end to corruption are in vain.“  — Rigoberta Menchú  #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #equality #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #speakout

"Truth will prevail where there is pains to bring it to light." - George Washington "Three things cannot long stay hidden: the sun, the moon and the truth." – Buddha "Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves; ensure justice for those being crushed." – Proverbs 31:8-9 #truth #light #SpeakUp #justice #safety  #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #safety #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #peace  Life transcends bad setbacks when people strive for justice, safety, peace, good, and truth. The truth may cause pain in the short term, but it sets people free!  Taking a stance against, and exposing, bullying shines a light on, and stops, abusive behaviors.

“Peace is more important than all justice; and peace was not made for the sake of justice, but justice for the sake of peace.” – Martin Luther "The safety of the people shall be the highest law." - Marcus Tullius Cicero “Prepare and prevent, don’t repair and repent.” - Ezra Taft Benson #peace #justice #safety #prepare #prevention #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #freedom #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #protection

"All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent." - Edmund Burke "Americans must always place constitutional values over authoritarian control." - Madison Cawthorn #freedom #speech #thoughts #Independence #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #justice #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #empower

"Multinational corporations do control. They control the politicians and judges. They control the media." - Jerry Brown "If the NDA requires silence, it enables the perpetrator to continue vile behavior. A broken NDA creates a double whammy; exposure of the bad behavior and the sordid effort to use an NDA to hide it. The cover up is often worse than the crime." - Rob Chesnut #truth #justice #speakout #safety #protect #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #inspire   #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #peace

If organization #managers #coaches #teachers #volunteers etc (ie Paterno and PSU Admins keeping silent for decades Sandusky's serial pedophilia) do not have the ethical / moral framework to stop bullies, or fail to value people enough to stop abuse, they are not worthy employers.