Tuesday, March 30, 2021

Break Through Fear


"Everything you've ever wanted is on the other side of fear." -George Addair

"We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when adults are afraid of the light." -Plato

#leadersarentbullies #stepup #healthyworkplaces #DignityAtWorkAct
#leaderselevatethoughtandconduct

Executives fear “the golden” bully, or the boss’s favorite or "the holder of secrets and dirt."  HR may pretend to address the issue with programs like conflict resolution (i.e., mediation, arbitration, intervention, team building), the wrong solution for the actual problem.

#Stepup

Yet, only 12% report it.

“In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends”. – Martin Luther King, Jr.

#leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

 

Monday, March 29, 2021

Spark the Spirit


 "Never underestimate the power of dreams and the influence of the human spirit. We are all the same in this notion: The potential for greatness lives within each of us." - Wilma Rudolph

#healthyworkplaces #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct

Aggressive behavior in the workplace occurs only when it is allowed by members on top of the hierarchy, within the context of a social relationships at work.  To stop abuse, it is important to identify how organizational power dynamics enable bullying.

Sunday, March 28, 2021

Feel Special


"People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." - Maya Angelou

#leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup

Friday, March 26, 2021

Freedom


“Freedom is the open window through which pours the sunlight of the human spirit and human dignity.” - Herbert Hoover

#leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

Marginally talented, yet popular, group members can fear, mob, and punish high-functioning and performing coworkers to try to "govern" them to "lower their bar” to the bully's level.  Leaders identify, address, and transcend this unhealthy dynamic.

Positive Surroundings


 "The best thing to do when you find yourself in a hurting or vulnerable place is to surround yourself with the strongest, finest, most positive people you know." - Kristin Armstrong

"When you surround yourself with nature, it's really powerful." - Hannah Teter

#leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

Wednesday, March 24, 2021

Independence


"Don't ever wrestle with a pig.  You'll both get dirty, but the pig will enjoy it."  - Cale Yarborough

#stopdomesticviolenceatwork #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct
#healthyworkplaces #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

Researchers found bullying at work results  from the bully's obsession to mute a target’s talents.  They also found between the target and bully a unique manifestation of interactive chemistry.  Bullies and their victims can become enmeshed.

#LeadersArentBullies

Dignity


 "You seek help from the elders. A society with elders is healthy. It's not always that way in the West." - Bernard Lagat

#leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

Monday, March 22, 2021

Peace


 "The first and most important choice a leader makes is the choice to serve, without which one's capacity to lead is severely limited." - Robert K. Greenleaf

#healthyworkplaces #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct

Opportunistic bullies often target talented and decent people to keep them from blocking the advancement of the bully's careers. Bullies target empathetic and considerate people who seem more easy to  intimidate than more assertive colleagues. 

#LeadersArentBullies

Dialogue


"Change happens by listening and then starting a dialogue with the people who are doing something you don't believe is right." - Jane Goodall

"The best way to solve problems and to fight against war is through dialogue." - Malala Yousafzai

#leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

Saturday, March 20, 2021

Speak Out!


 Wave Goodbye to Winter,  Say Hello to Spring!

"To sin by silence, when we should protest, Makes cowards out of (all)." - Ella Wheeler Wilcox

"Where you see wrong or inequality or injustice, speak out, because this is your country. This is your democracy. Make it. Protect it. Pass it on." - Thurgood Marshall

#stepup #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #DignityAtWorkAct #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct

Emotional Intelligence

Have you ever been hijacked by emotions or experienced buyer's remorse?

55% of a person's vote in influenced by a candidate's visual appeal.  38% is influenced by  how a candidate sounds.  7% of a voter's choice is based on what a candidate says.

"Emotions can get in the way or get you on the way." - Mavis Mazhura

#leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

 

Thursday, March 18, 2021

Civility


"When there is oppression and dictatorship, by not speaking out, we lose our dignity." - Asma Jahangir

"Civility is the recognition that all people have dignity that's inherent to their person, no matter their religion, race, gender, sexuality, or ability." - Opal Tometi

#leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

Healing is Possible


 "There are wounds that never show on the body that are deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds." - Laurell K. Hamilton

"The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma" - Book by Bessel van der Kolk

#leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

Tuesday, March 16, 2021

Freedom


Just as Desi could not bully Lucy into the traditional role of the idealized motherfigure in "I Love Lucy," leaders can’t expect to lead everyone with an iron fist. 

#LeadersArentBullies

"When we lose the right to be different, we lose the privilege to be free." - Charles Evans Hughes

#leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup

Good Organizations

"The world is not fair, and often fools, cowards, liars and the selfish hide in high places." 
- Bryant H. McGill

#leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

Sunday, March 14, 2021

Trust


"Teamwork begins by building trust. And the only way to do that is to overcome our need for invulnerability." – Patrick Lencioni

#leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

Factors my clients believe make great families: love, #communication, clear goals, support, encouragement, safety, trust, protection, inspiration, work, clear roles and boundaries, responsibility, discipline, a sense of team, etc..  These also help create great work teams.

Healing is Possible

"However it may present itself, abuse is never the fault of the victim. It is 100 percent the responsibility and choice of the abuser." - Suzanne Adams

It's not your fault.  You are not alone.  Healing is possible.   It's never too late to heal. 

#leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct


Friday, March 12, 2021

Culture Starts at the Top


Executive collusion creates a culture of spiraling incivility, where employees believe their entire organization, and not just the bully, disrespects its employees.

#LeadersArentBullies

"The fish stinks first at the head." - Sir James Porter

,#healthyworkplaces #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct

Mature

"As human beings, we all mature physically from childhood to adolescence and then into adulthood, but for some, our emotions lag behind." - Bernard Sumner

"Some age, others mature." - Sean Connery

#leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

Wednesday, March 10, 2021

Do Something


Bullying festers only in organizations where abuse is tolerated.  Workplace harassment, abuse, discrimination, and bullying are allowed only in organizations with condoning, complicit, and colluding executives.

#LeadersArentBullies

"The world will not be destroyed by those who do evil, but by those who watch them without doing anything." – Albert Einstein

#healthyworkplaces #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct

Serve


 "Leadership is an opportunity to serve. It is not a trumpet call to self-importance." - J. Donald Walters

#leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

Monday, March 8, 2021

Stand Up to Bullies


When a bully is protected, or considered an essential member of an organization, respective dignity at work and anti-bullying policies may be discounted.  As with domestic violence, targets can be scapegoated. This encourages repeated abuse and bullying.

#LeadersArentBullies

“It’s important to stand up to all forms of bullying, and it’s even more important for those who are around you to be just as courageous and stand with you!” – Normani Kordei

#healthyworkplaces #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct

Shine Your Light


"Ooh, the silence treatment." - Ally Carter

"Realize the silent treatment and isolation is used by abusive personalities to control, punish, invalidate, and silence you and your talents." - Narcissistic personality disorder FB mother page

#healthyworkplaces #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct

Saturday, March 6, 2021

East Beach, Westport


 Looking East at Cuttyhunk, 5 miles away.

"The goal you set must be challenging. At the same time, it should be realistic and attainable, not impossible to reach. It should be challenging enough to make you stretch, but not so far that you break yourself or others." - Rick Hansen

#healthyworkplaces #stepup

Supervisors who are under intense pressure to meet unrealistic performance expectations also are prone to bully, even when these supervisors are not bullied by their managers. 

#LeadersArentBullies

Confidence is Silent

"Confidence is silent.  Insecurities are loud."
- Godfather

"It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt." - Mark Twain

#leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

 

Thursday, March 4, 2021

Break the Cycle


Berated and bullied workplace targets are apt to repeat the abuse cycle with employees they supervise.  Abusive senior executive conduct often trickles down a hierarchy and results in horrific individual contributor and client experiences. 

#LeadersArentBullies

"Breaking the cycle begins with you." - Mojgan Rady

#leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

Transparency


 "Sweetie, if you're going to be two faced, at least make one of them pretty." - Marilyn Monroe

#leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

Tuesday, March 2, 2021

Watch your Words


 "Words have energy and power with the ability to help, to heal, to hinder, to hurt, to harm, to humiliate, and to humble." -Yehuda Berg

#healthyworkplaces #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct

People are more apt to listen, learn, and to improve performance when they receive constructive, tactful, and respectful #feedback.  Destructive and inconsiderate feedback undermines trust and performance.

#LeadersArentBullies

Healthy Relationships

“Anger is a feeling that makes your mouth work faster than your mind.” -- Evan Esar

#leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct