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Showing posts from 2023

Truth

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"No legacy is so rich as honesty." - William Shakespeare "It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye." - Antoine de Saint-Exupery "Rather than love, than money, than fame, give me truth." - Henry David Thoreau #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact  

Proclaim Them

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“Instead of being ashamed of what you’ve been through, be proud what you have overcome.” – Dr. Phil "The conflict between the will to deny horrible events and the will to proclaim them aloud is the central dialectic of psychological trauma." - Judith Lewis Herman #stepup #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Bullied organizations and individuals display PTSD symptoms. Like a deer in headlights, they freeze when bullied. It’s a fear-based response, where criticism evokes memories of a critical parent or bully. #LeadersArentBullies

Acknowledge and Change

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"Change the changeable, (acknowledge) the unchangeable, and remove yourself from the unacceptable." - Denis Waitley "The proactive approach to a mistake is to acknowledge it instantly, correct and learn from it." - Stephen Covey #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Stay Strong and Intact

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"Abuse grows from attitudes and values, not feelings. The roots are ownership, the trunk is entitlement, and the branches are control." - Lundy Bancroft "You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them." - Maya Angelou #stepup #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Bullying managers leverage email, voicemail, text, cell phones and other bullies to communicate unclear and accusatory messages meant to put the target or recipient on defense and focused on the bully instead of production and healthy performance/functioning.

Healthy Results, Processes, and Relationships

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"Doing well is the result of doing good. That's what capitalism is all about." - Ralph Waldo Emerson "The good life is a process, not a state of being. It is a direction not a destination." - Carl Rogers "Never above you. Never below you. Always beside you." - Walter Winchell #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Empower with Autonomy

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"Leaders who are kind of insecure or egocentric, they basically sabotage themselves." - John C. Maxwell "Narcissism is a clinical trait that belies a deep sense of emptiness, low self-esteem, emotional detachment, self-loathing, extreme problems with intimacy." - Drew Pinsky Bullies create and either heroically put out their own fires, or they expect others to solve these problems, but a bully only delegates problems with impossible solutions, so those beholden to the bully fail to meet these unrealistic expectations. #LeadersArentBullies #healthyworkplaces #stepup   #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Be Tough and Good

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"You have to have confidence in your ability, and then be tough enough to follow through." - Rosalynn Carter "Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars." - Khalil Gibran #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Listen and Respect Boundaries

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"There cannot be greater rudeness than to interrupt another in the current of his discourse." - John Locke "Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others." - Brene Brown #healthyworkplaces #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Bullies in management roles interrupt. They lack respect and consideration and fail to practice appropriate boundaries with their workers. #LeadersArentBullies Wind farm windmill heading to its permanent site.

Self Awareness and Objectivity

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"We all have mental models: the lens through which we see the world that drive our responses to everything we experience. Being aware of your mental models is key to being objective." - Elizabeth Thornton "Mental models are deeply ingrained assumptions, generalizations, or even pictures of images that influence how we understand the world and how we take action." - Peter Senge #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Appreciate and Recognize

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"Appreciation is a wonderful thing: It makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well." - Voltaire "Recognition is a reward in itself. Any form of appreciation, even a small word, is important." - Vikrant Massey #healthyworkplaces #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Given the following three choices—lack of recognition, lack of money, and lack of challenge—85% of employees who’ve left an organization state it’s because they didn’t feel appreciated or recognized. #LeadersArentBullies

Transparent and Authentic

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"The greatest deception (people) suffer is from their own opinions." - Leonardo da Vinci "Petty (people) are eager to make boasts, yet desire that others should believe them. They  enthusiastically engage in deception, yet want others to have affection for them. They  conduct themselves like animals, yet want others to think well of them." - Xun Kuang #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Consistent and Honest

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"Trust is built with consistency." - Lincoln Chafee "I believe fundamental honesty is the keystone of business." - Harvey S. Firestone "Trust has to be earned, and should come only after the passage of time." - Arthur Ashe #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Good managers don’t #micromanage , and they are not overly critical of subordinates. Employees need to know when they perform below or above expected levels and how to correct or sustain this performance with constructive feedback based on observations and facts.

Empower Innovation

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"If an organization values innovation, you can assume it's safe to speak up with new ideas, leaders will listen, and your voice matters." - Adam Grant "When entire companies embrace a growth mindset, their employees report feeling far more empowered and committed; they also receive far greater organizational support for collaboration and innovation." - Carol S. Dweck #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Healthy and Constructive Feedback

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"Feedback is the breakfast of champions." - Ken Blanchard "When we make progress and get better at something, it is inherently motivating. In order for people to make progress, they have to get feedback and information on how they're doing." - Daniel H. Pink #healthyworkplaces #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Effective managers are committed to providing constructive and objective performance feedback to achieve desired outcomes.  They demonstrate rational behavior and respect for their employees. #LeadersArentBullies

Value Human Life

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"I dream a world in which each of us walks with the knowledge of how beautiful - and valuable - is each human life." - Jacqueline Novogratz "Things gained through unjust fraud are never secure." - Sophocles "When we live in a world that is very unjust, you have to be a dissident." - Nawal El Saadawi #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Choose To let Go

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"The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another." -William James "Letting go helps us to to live in a more peaceful state of mind and helps restore our balance. This frees us from unnecessary stress." - Melody Beattie #leadersarentbullies May Thanksgiving bring you much peace, love, joy, and reduced stress.  When stress goes unabated, it compromises a target’s mental health, and when unseen psychological trauma is caused by unsafe, stressful work conditions, it’s every bit as damaging as physical injuries. #Stepup #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Hanging out in the shade today, trying not to be noticed. Happy Thanksgiving!

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Acknowledge Abuse

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“You cannot solve a problem until you acknowledge that you have one and accept responsibility for solving it.” - Zig Ziglar #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Integrate Trauma and Heal

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"PTSD occurs following a trauma that was so awful that in retrospect you don't understand how you survived. What that causes is an extreme feeling of vulnerability that you get past but that doesn't go away." - Mark Goulston #healthyworkplaces #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact An early Swedish study among 64 victims of bullying at work attending a rehabilitation program concluded that 65% of the patients suffered from PTSD. #LeadersArentBullies

Light and Hope

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"I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness because it shows me the stars." - Og Mandino "Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the darkness." - Desmond Tutu "There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it." - Edith Wharton #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Be Surrounded by Benevolent Buffers to Bullying

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"Don't let people disrespect you. My mom says don't open the door to the devil. Surround yourself with positive people." - Cuba Gooding, Jr. "If you surround yourself with love and the right people, anything is possible." - Adam Green #healthyworkplaces #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Bullying victims report increased psychological distress: anxiety, depression, negative emotions, and overt anger. In the workplace, high levels of burnout and emotional exhaustion are common. #LeadersArentBullies

Blossom

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"No talent, no self-denial, no brains, no character, are required to set up in the fault-finding business. Your time is too precious to be sacrificed in wasted days combating the menial forces of hate, jealousy, and envy. Only God can shape a flower, but any foolish child can pull it to pieces." - Og Mandino #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Transparency & Social & Ethical Responsibility

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"A lack of transparency results in distrust and a deep sense of insecurity." - Dalai Lama "Corporate social responsibility is measured in terms of businesses improving conditions for their employees, shareholders, communities, and environment." - Klaus Schwab #stepup #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact A leader who cares about balancing the bottom line with running a respectful  and #transparent enterprise is enlightened.  They value equitable results, processes, and relationships, and understand how eliminating and preventing bullying “contains costs."

Positive, Courageous, and Persistent

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"Persistence and resilience only come from having been given the chance to work though difficult problems." - Gever Tulley "In order to carry a positive action we must develop here a positive vision." - Dalai Lama "Hope lies in dreams, in imagination, and in the courage of those who dare to make dreams into reality." - Jonas Salk #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Respect and Engage

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“When people are emotionally invested, they want to contribute.” - Simon Sinek “Employees engage with employers and brands when they’re treated as humans worthy of respect.” - Meghan M. Biro #leadersarentbullies #stepup #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Presentee-ism describes how bullied and abused workers, who cannot find another job with equivalent pay, behave. They stay, show up daily, but present only in body and not in spirit or mind. They are the antithesis of “engaged” workers.

Mutual Trust and Respect

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"When there is no sharing of power, no rule of law, no accountability, there is abuse, corruption, subjugation and indignation." - Atifete Jahjaga "This world of ours... must avoid becoming a community of dreadful fear and hate, and be, instead, a proud confederation of mutual trust and respect." - Dwight D. Eisenhower #leadersarentbullies #healthyworplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Prevent Bullying

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"Even the largest avalanche is triggered by small things." - Vernor Vinge "Prevention is better than cure." - Desiderius Erasmus #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact One relatively minor bullying incident involving operational level workers can avalanche into a deleterious global organizational disaster when an organization is rife with aggregate, independent, abusive behaviors.  Like a spark, it can set afire a hostile and threatening working culture. #LeadersArentBullies

Understanding and Laughter

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"In every crisis, doubt or confusion, take the higher path - the path of compassion, courage, understanding and love." Amit Ray "In prehistoric times, mankind often had only two choices in crisis situations: fight or flee. In modern times, humor offers us a third alternative; fight, flee - or laugh." Robert Orben #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplace #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Character, Safety, and Protection

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"Trauma is a fact of life. It does not, however, have to be a life sentence." - Peter A. Levine "Character in leadership is the most important balance for leadership. Without character, leaders have no safety. Leadership has no protection without character." - Myles Munroe #leadersarentbullies #healthyworplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact The most common target response is to discuss the bullying experience with colleagues. This debriefing time is non productive and can be traumatic, casting a negative and harmful pall on the organization's culture. This can destroy an organization. 

Liberate and Inspire

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"We are in this life to enlarge the soul, liberate the spirit, and light up the brain." - Tom Robbins "Keep your face always toward the sunshine - and shadows will fall behind you." - Walt Whitman #leadersarentbullies #healthyworplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Speak Up

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"The predator wants your silence. It feeds their power, entitlement, and they want it to feed your shame." - Viola Davis "Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented." - Elie Wiesel "Never be bullied into silence. Define yourself." - Harvey Fierstein #healthyworplaces #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact The most commonly accepted definition to-date of bullying, is when“one or more targets, repeatedly over a period, are exposed to negative acts conducted by one or more predators.” #LeadersArentBullies

Truth and Confidence

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"Truth is like the sun. You can shut it out for a time, but it ain't goin' away." - Elvis Presley "Confidence... thrives on honesty, on honor, on the sacredness of obligations, on faithful protection and on unselfish performance. Without them it cannot live." - Franklin D. Roosevelt #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplace #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Step Up Against Bullying and Violence

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"Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent." - Isaac Asimov "Nothing good ever comes of violence." - Martin Luther "Bullying is caused by the bully's insecurity." - Shay Mitchell "You can't be against bullying without actually doing something about it." - Randi Weingarten #HealthyWorkplace #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact The International Labor Office (ILO), a UN Agency, states “workplace bullying is one of the fastest-growing forms of workplace violence.” #LeadersArentBullies #workplaceculture

Competent, Confident, Courageous, Consistent

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"A competent and self-confident person is incapable of jealousy in anything. Jealousy is invariably a symptom of neurotic insecurity." - Robert A. Heinlein "One isn't necessarily born with courage, but one is born with potential. Without courage, we cannot practice any other virtue with consistency. We can't be kind, true, merciful, generous, or honest." - Maya Angelou #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplace #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Healthy Individuals and Organizations

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"In individuals, insanity is rare; but in groups, parties, nations and epochs, it is the rule." - Friedrich Nietzsche "Health is not valued till sickness comes." - Thomas Fuller "It is madness for sheep to talk peace with a wolf." - Thomas Fuller #HealthyWorkplace #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct   #psychologicalsafetyatworkact The sickest workplaces tolerate, and even encourage, bullying behaviors, hostility, and aggressiveness, resulting in an exasperated and deflated workforce. #LeadersArentBullies

Recognize and Praise

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"Kindness is more important than wisdom, and the recognition of this is the beginning of wisdom." - Theodore Isaac Rubin "The trouble with most of us is that we would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism." - Norman Vincent Peale "I pay no attention whatever to anybody's praise or blame. I simply follow my own feelings." - Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplace #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Build and Protect

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"Trauma has the power to destroy and the power to transform and resurrect." - Peter A. Levine "To destroy can be the thoughtless act of a single day." - Winston Churchill "In law a (person) is guilty when they violate others' rights. In ethics, if they only think of it." - Kant #HealthyWorkplace #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Workplace bullying destroys #effectiveness and #efficiency . It wastes time, energy,and money. It is a de-motivator, a poor human resource practice, and workplace abuse violates the constitutional and inalienable rights of US Workers. #LeadersArentBullies

Respect and Innovate

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"One of the most sincere forms of respect is actually listening to what another has to say." - Bryant H. McGill "To be one, to be united is a great thing. But to respect the right to be different is maybe even greater." - Bono "For good ideas and true innovation, you need constructive human interaction." - Margaret Heffernan #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplace #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Fight Power and Abuse

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"Whatever is begun in anger ends in shame." - Benjamin Franklin "Empires (corporations) implode from within due to their excesses." - Gad Saad "Where an excess of power prevails, no one is safe in their opinion, their person, their faculties, or possessions." - James Madison #leadersarentbullies #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact The combination of productivity loss by victims and work groups and the resultant costs regarding interventions by third parties amounts from anywhere between $30,000 and $100,000 per year for each individual workplace bullying and abuse case. #HealthyWorkplace

Shine and Seed

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"As we let our light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence actually liberates others." - Marianne Williamson "Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant." - Robert Louis Stevenson #leadersarentbullies #healthworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Resolve Trauma

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"The effects of unresolved trauma can be devastating. It can affect our outlook on life. It can take a toll on our family life and interpersonal relationships. It can trigger  physical pain, symptoms, disease, and a range of self-destructive behaviors." - Peter A. Levine #Stepup #healthworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Employees claim harassment and bullying at work, on a personal and micro-level, is a more crippling and devastating problem than all other work-related stressors combined. #LeadersArentBullies

Compassion

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"Someone who has experienced trauma also has gifts to offer all of us - in their depth, their knowledge of our universal vulnerability, and their experience of the power of compassion." - Sharon Salzberg "Delusional (mental and emotional) pain hurts just as much as pain from actual (physical)  trauma. So what if it's all in your head?" - Octavia E. Butler #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Application and Performance

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"Productivity is never an accident. It is always the result of a commitment to excellence, intelligent planning, and focused effort." - Paul J. Meyer "A manager is responsible for the application and performance of knowledge." - Peter Drucker #healthyworkplaces #StepUP #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Workplace bullying in the United States costs organizations as much as $14K per employee per year in lost performance. #LeadersArentBullies

Objectivity and Knowledge

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"To increase our objectivity, we must learn to switch off the mini-movies. Objectivity requires us to be mindful, present in the moment, and experiencing what is happening without judgment." - Elizabeth Thornton "Opinion is the medium between knowledge and ignorance." - Plato #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact  

Stop Bullying & Resolve Trauma

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"Unresolved trauma can be devastating. It can affect our habits and outlook on life, leading to addictions and poor decision-making. It can take a toll on relationships and trigger physical pain and disease. It also may lead self-destructive behaviors."  - Peter A. Levine #Stepup #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact The emotional and physiological damage induced by workplace bullying extracts a significant human cost, with obvious financial losses in the form of sickness, turnover, vandalism, violence, absenteeism. and ill will. #LeadersArentBullies

Overcome Fear with Collaboration

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"The best way to begin genuine bipartisanship to make America stronger is to work together on the real crises facing our country, not to manufacture an artificial crisis to serve a special interest agenda out of touch with the needs of Americans." - John F. Kerry "The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest and strongest kind of fear is fear of the unknown." - H. P. Lovecraft #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Healthy Beliefs = Good Behaviors

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"Behavior is the mirror where everyone shows their image (values and beliefs)." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe "The fact is that people are good, Give people affection and security, and they will give affection and be secure in their feelings and their behavior." - Abraham Maslow "Most bad behavior comes from insecurity." - Debra Winger #healthyworkplaces #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Organizational culture reflects workers' shared values and beliefs, and how they influence accepted behaviors about how things get accomplished. Organizational bullying may be tolerated as part of the “way things have always been done.” Demand change! #LeadersArentBullies

Protect Inalienable Rights

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"If the people cannot trust their government to do the job for which it exists - to protect them and to promote their common welfare - all else is lost." - Barack Obama "The right of each individual in any relation to secure to (themselves) the full benefits of (their) intelligence, (their) capacity, (their) industry and skill are among the inalienable inheritances of humanity." - Leland Stanford #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Credible and Consistent Responses to Bullying

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"Relationships feed on credibility, honesty, and consistency." - Scott Borchetta "Between stimulus and response  is our power to choose a response. In response is our growth and freedom." - Viktor E. Frankl "Heroism often results as a response to extreme events." - James Geary #healthyworkplaces #stepup #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Having a credible and effective method for managing complaints and intervening in #bullying cases inhibits aggressive, bullying behaviors and reduces defenseless target anxiety. #LeadersArentBullies

Believe

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"Keep your dreams alive. Understand to achieve anything requires faith and belief in yourself, vision, hard work, determination, and dedication. Remember all things are possible for those who believe." - Gail Devers #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #psychologicalsafetyatworkact