Matt Paknis Leadership Development

Collusion creates a culture of spiraling incivility, causing employees to believe their entire organization, and not just the bully, disrespects its employees. and..."The collusion of big business, big labor, and big government threaten the spirit of small business that makes America great." - Foster Friess #leadersarentbullies #stepup #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct

 "Humility is the foundation of all the other virtues hence, in the soul in which this virtue does not exist there cannot be any other virtue except in mere appearance." - Saint Augustine #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

 Mt. Hope Bridge Repeated bullying only occurs in organizations that tolerate bullying behavior. Harassment, abuse, and bullying at work cannot occur without the direct or indirect agreement of senior management. They know and choose to look away. "Silence is complicity." - Michelle Malkin "All share complicity in the destruction of that much under-rated phenomenon called liberty." - Barbara Amiel #leadersarentbullies #stepup #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct

 "Denial ain't just a river in Egypt." - Mark Twain "Disinformation is more than just lying: it's the denial and twisting of reality in order to present some desired image to the rest of the world." - Will Hurd Hope you all are safe and warm in the storm.  So far, so good here on MA's Southcoast.  #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

"Nepotism (and favoritism) will never give you success, but talent can." - Ashok Saraf #leadersarentbullies #stepup #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct When a bully is a valuable member of an organization, the anti-bullying protocol may fall by the wayside and targets become scapegoats. This reinforces the bully’s behaviors.

 “Don’t be distracted by criticism. Remember – the only taste of success some people have is when they take a bite out of you.” -Zig Ziglar #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

"There are three constants in life... change, choice and principles." - Stephen Covey "Morality may consist solely in the courage of making a choice." - Leon Blum #leadersarentbullies #stepup #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct #Peace A supervisor without proper management training may also choose to bully when he or she is under intense pressure to perform, even if that pressure does not come in the form of bullying.

"Everyone rises to their level of incompetence." –Dr. Lawrence Peter "Some people are so addicted to their misery that they will destroy anything that gets in the way of their fix." - Bryant McGill "Having a bad boss isn't your fault. Staying with one is.” — Nora Denzel #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

Being berated can lead a target to repeat the abusive behavior. When the victim of bullying behavior supervises other employees, those consequences can fall on the shoulders of that individual’s subordinates. "Be the person who breaks the cycle.   Vow to be better than what broke you—to heal instead of becoming bitter so you can act from your heart, not your pain." - Lori Deschene #leadersarentbullies #stepup #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct

"Dictatorship naturally arises out of democracy, and the most aggravated form of tyranny and slavery out of the most extreme liberty." - Plato #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

“ #Feedback , like rain, should be gentle enough to nourish a person’s growth without destroying his roots.” – Frank A. Clark #leadersarentbullies #stepup #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct Individuals are more motivated to use #feedback delivered tactfully and constructively to improve their performance rather than negative feedback delivered in an inconsiderate manner.

"You will never get the truth out of a narcissist (bully).  The closest you will ever come is a story that either makes them the victim or the hero, but never the villain." - Shannon l. Alder

Social inclusion—belonging to a group—is a fundamental human need. Co-workers driven by a bully to ostracize one or more of their own are cutting out part of their team's soul.  #LeadersArentBullies "A deep sense of love and belonging is an irreducible need of all people. When those needs are not met, we don't function as we were meant to. We break. We fall apart. We numb. We ache. We hurt others. We get sick." - Brene Brown #stepup

Yet only 12% of these witnesses do anything to address it. "The ultimate tragedy is not the oppression and cruelty by the bad people but the silence over that by the good people." "In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." - - Martin Luther King, Jr. #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

“Life’s most persistent and urgent question is, ‘What are you doing for others?'” “Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.” - Dr. Martin Luther King Jr  #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct Given the profile of a prosocial and positive target, bullies often command coworkers to isolate the target, prohibiting them from helping the target on work-related tasks, or fraternizing with the target, or even taking breaks at the same time.

"We do not see people as they are, but as they appear to us. And these appearances are usually misleading." - Robert Greene #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

"Education is the movement from darkness to light." - Allan Bloom #leadersarentbullies #stepup #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct Why are managers not prepared? Why are they incompetent to deal with bullies? The fact is relatively few businesses and management schools teach about power and control dynamics. #LeadersArentBullies

"Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." - Victor E. Frankl #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

"True freedom requires the rule of law and justice, and a judicial system in which the rights of some are not secured by the denial of rights to others." - Jonathan Sacks #leadersarentbullies #stepup #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct A bullying victim may file a complaint against their employer when it fails to protect employees against cyber bullying discrimination.  A bully who posts discriminatory messages on employee owned technology violates the rights of employees who identify with protected classes.

 As played out in the great resign: “Train people well enough so they can leave, treat them well enough so they don’t want to.” - Richard Branson #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

#Cyberbullying has become a significant problem in the past decade. The ubiquity of handheld and other devices affords bullies anytime access to their prey, and harassment can often be carried out anonymously. #LeadersArentBullies "It's unfortunate that cyberbullying is something that happens to 13-year-old kids in junior high and adults in the workplace. It's something that we have to deal with as Americans (and as citizens of the world)." - Karen Civil #leadersarentbullies #stepup #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct

"Unresolved trauma can affect our habits and outlook on life, leading to addictions and poor decision-making.  It can take a toll on our family life and interpersonal relationships. It can trigger real physical pain, symptoms, and disease. And it can lead to a range of self-destructive behaviors.   The paradox of trauma is that it has both the power to destroy and the power to transform and resurrect." - Peter A. Levine #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

 "Power doesn't corrupt people, people corrupt power." - William Gaddis "The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any." - Alice Walker #leadersarentbullies #stepup #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct In several client organizations, workers complained of being held “captive” by bullying bosses who use company-issued cell phones to contact subordinates whenever desired. This technology allows bullies to invade target and victim boundaries outside of work.

"Sometimes when you're overwhelmed by a situation - when you're in the darkest of darkness - that's when your priorities are reordered and you heal." - Phoebe Snow #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

"The mob is the mother of tyrants (and bullies). - Diogenes #leadersarentbullies #stepup #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct A mob mentality, or what can be called a “group think,” arises when workers sense protection and security from a boss who sends subliminal and overt messages conveying workers are safe if they don’t rat on the boss’s bullying.

"If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you always got."  - Albert Einstein "If at first the idea is not absurd, then there will be no hope for it."  - Albert Einstein #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

"There's some jerks. There's some big egos. There are a few that think they're one of the Founding Fathers... in both parties." - John Kennedy #leadersarentbullies #stepup #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct Bullying is typically motivated by the bully’s insecurities and inadequacies. Any colleague who unwittingly threatens to highlight or expose a bully’s failings or insecurities is a potential target.

"There are a thousand hacking at the branches of evil to one who is striking at the root." - Henry David Thoreau "I believe the root of all evil is abuse of power." - Patricia Cornwell #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct

California, Maine, Michigan, RI, or Washington? "Fear is the only true enemy, born of ignorance and the parent of anger and hate." - Edward Albert #leadersarentbullies #stepup #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct Bullies tend to target good people simply because of their “goodness.” These targets don’t do anything wrong to attract or to justify #bullying. Targets do many things right actually, and this, of course, makes bullies jealous and irrational in retaliation.

"There's a world of difference between truth and facts. Facts can obscure the truth." - Maya Angelou #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct  

 Step Into the New Year! "Corporate moral responsibility goes further, reflecting the need for corporations to address fundamental ethical issues such as inclusion, dignity, and equality." - Klaus Schwab #leadersarentbullies #stepup #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #DignityAtWorkAct 29% of those 24 years & younger reported getting bullied. The same percentage got reported by those 50 & older. Experts suggest both age groups are vulnerable, the younger people because of their inexperience and the older people because of society’s obsession with youth.

Happy New Year! "My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we'll change the world." - Jack Layton #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #stepup #DignityAtWorkAct