Matt Paknis Leadership Development

  29, 24, 31.....how? "The doctrine of blind obedience and submission to any human power is the doctrine of despotism." - Angelina Grimke "It's most acceptable to not run with cliques." - Megan Fox “Followers. Sometimes, with some things, it’s best to keep your tally down.” -Donna Lynn Hope #endbullying Bullies derive most of their support from HR. It's a club, a clique, a veritable wagon train that defensively circles the wagons when one of their “own” is accused. #LeadersArentBullies

"Nothing brings me more happiness than trying to help the most vulnerable people in society.." - Princess Diana “The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.” – Mahatma Gandhi “Everybody can be great because everybody can serve.” – Martin Luther King, Jr. “Leadership is service, not position.” – Tim Fargo  

"There's just some magic in truth and honesty and openness." - Frank Ocean "Real magic in relationships means an absence of judgment of others." - Wayne Dyer "Miracles are a retelling in small letters of the very same story which is written across the whole world in letters too large for some of us to see." - C. S. Lewis

"Japan's just so traditional and so specific in their ways. It's kind of untouched, it's not Americanized." - Toni Collette "The main object of conciliation in Japan lies in reaching a solution to a case based upon morals and with a warm heart.'' - Derek Bok Then, why did Toray Plastics America, a Japanese Company, sue me on false grounds in Providence Federal Court in 2018 and ultimately dismiss the case with prejudice and pay my legal fees in 2023? I experienced no solution based on morals with a warm heart. Toray used the US legal system to bring me harm and to undermine my book's success. 

"Mediocrity knows nothing higher than itself, but talent instantly recognizes genius." - Arthur Conan Doyle #leadersarentbullies Everyone is afraid to confront “the golden” bully, the boss’s favorite or the family's heir apparent. HR misapplies the tools of traditional performance management (i.e. warnings, write ups, suspensions, terminations).  When HR does act, it’s almost always the wrong response.

"Leadership is the capacity to translate vision into reality." – Warren Bennis “The function of leadership is to produce more leaders, not more followers.” -Ralph Nader "If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader." -John Quincy Adams

"Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions." - Dalai Lama "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go." - Oscar Wilde "Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking." - Marcus Aurelius #leadersarentbullies

"Throughout history, it has been the inaction of those who could have acted; the indifference of those who should have known better; the silence of the voice of justice when it mattered most; that has made it possible for evil to triumph." - Haile Selassie

"Appreciation is a wonderful thing: It makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well." - Voltaire "Go where you are wanted and stray from where you aren’t. Surround yourself with positive people and environments." - Demi Lovato #endbullying #betransparent #stepup #metoo #leadersarentbullies #innerpeace #healthyworkplaces #metoomovement #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Sometimes disgruntled and disengaged employees might punish high-performing coworkers in an attempt to "govern" them into “lowering the bar,” while bullying bosses are threatened by, and chastise, exceptional talent. Stick with your talents and high standards and take them where they are appreciated.

"A good leader takes a little more than his share of the blame, a little less than his share of the credit." - Arnold H. Glasow "A genuine leader is not a searcher for consensus but a molder of consensus." - Martin Luther King, Jr. "Leadership is unlocking people's potential to become better." -Bill Bradley

“Mental health is just as important as… physical health and deserves the same quality of support.” – Kate Middleton "The triggers aggravating mental health issues in our society - bullying at work, social media negativity and anxiety, substance abuse, etc., need to be identified and we need to speak up about these more to get to the source of the problems." - Sanam Saeed

"No individual or company, no matter how large or how profitable, is above the law." - Eric Holder Toray Plastics America of North Kingston, RI was allowed to file a baseless lawsuit against me, falsely claiming a common reader could identify Toray in my book. They are not mentioned, referenced, or identifiable in my book.   Toray American managers sued me in reality to bring me harm, in retaliation for my elevating a credible shooting threat report they asked me to conduct, yet told me not to share with Japanese Expat Toray Executives.   Japanese executives asked me for the report and I shared it with them to prevent a shooting  and to address the respective plant's abysmal performance.   Toray's being one of the largest employers in the state may have influenced the Federal Judge and Magistrate assigned to the case to delay the case for over four years (Federal Lawsuits average between twelve to fourteen months from filing to hearing) and claim the c...

"The predator wants your silence. It feeds their power, entitlement, and they want it to feed your shame." - Viola Davis "Where you see wrong or inequality or injustice, speak out, because this is your country. This is your democracy. Make it. Protect it. Pass it on." - Thurgood Marshall #endbullying #BeTransparent #stepup #healthyworkplaces #innerpeace #metoo #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Opportunistic workplace bullies often choose a victim to advance their own career. Many select talented, sincere, and decent, yet vulnerable, victims who can be more easily intimidated compared to their more savvy colleagues. #LeadersArentBullies

"Where there is injury let me sow pardon." - Francis of Assisi "The folly which we might have ourselves committed is the one which we are least ready to pardon in another." - Joseph Roux

"Most misunderstandings in the world could be avoided if people would simply take the time to ask, “What else could this mean?” – Shannon Alder "Anyone can become angry—that is easy, but to be angry with the right person at the right time, and for the right purpose, and in the right way—that is not easy." – Aristotle

"Corruption is the enemy of development, and of good governance. It must be got rid of. Both the government and the people at large must come together to achieve this national objective." - Pratibha Patil

“What hurts the victim most is not the cruelty of the oppressor, but the silence of the bystander.” — Elie Wiesel "In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." — Martin Luther King Jr. #leadersarentbullies #metoomovement #BeTransparent #stepup #metoo #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Workers have difficulty empathizing (as a passive bystander) with a bully’s target or victim until the bully’s gaze and focus is on them. They then never again want to be a victim. #workplaceculture

"Nepotism sometimes can be a lose-lose situation." - Vikram Chatwal "Of all presidential perks, the pardon power has a special significance. It is just the kind of authority that would attract the special attention of someone obsessed with himself and his own ability to influence events." - Barbara Olson

“Let the elders who rule well be considered worthy of double honor, especially those who labor in preaching and teaching.” - Japanese Proverb "You will be courteous to your elders who have explored to the point from which you may advance; and helpful to your juniors who will progress farther by reason of your labors." - Abbott L. Lowell

"The only difference between the Republican and Democratic parties is the velocities with which their knees hit the floor when corporations knock on their door. That's the only difference." - Ralph Nader

"The key to successful leadership today is influence, not authority." - Ken Blanchard "One of the best ways to influence people is to make them feel important, one of the deepest human desires." – Roy Bennett "Example is the only thing when influencing."  – Albert Schweitzer #endbullying #BeTransparent #stepup #metoo #healthyworkplaces #innerpeace #leadersarentbullies #metoomovement #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Desi couldn't bully Lucy into a traditional female role, and today's leaders can’t control with power. My audiences agree: despite its impotence, workplace aggression, abuse, bullying, incivility, social undermining, and conflict has increased over the past seven decades.

"If the freedom of speech is taken away then dumb and silent we may be led, like sheep to the slaughter." - George Washington "Do I not destroy my enemies when I make them my friends?" - Abraham Lincoln

Happy Thanksgiving!   Hope Your Holidays Overflow with Positive Emotions!

"Trust not too much to appearances." - Virgil "Lawsuits - and frivolous lawsuits - are just sapping the life out of the people who perform the services and deliver the goods for the rest of the citizenry." - Conrad Burns

 "The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each other's life." -Richard Bach "Family means no one gets left behind or forgotten." - David Ogden Stiers #leadersarentbullies #stepup Clients are asked what factors distinguish great families. Responses include: love, #communication , goals, support, encouragement, safety, trust, protection, elevation, clear goals & boundaries, a sense of team, and more. They all agree these traits help all organization thrive.

"A great (person) is a torch in the darkness, a beacon in superstition's night, an inspiration and a prophecy." - Robert Green Ingersoll "Humility is the true key to success. Successful people lose their way at times. They often embrace and overindulge from the fruits of success. Humility halts this arrogance and self-indulging trap. Humble people share the credit and wealth, remaining focused and hungry to continue the journey of success." - Rick Pitino

"In a way, bullying is a "normalized," evil. It's hugely prevalent, all too often ignored - and being ignored, it is therefore condoned." - Trudie Styler "The only way to deal with bullies is to stand up to them." - Keisha Knight Pulliam "Bullying is a cowardly act. It's easy to bully someone when they aren't looking or when they can't fight back." - Ronda Rousey

"The collusion of big business, big labor, and big government threaten the spirit of small business that makes America great." - Foster Friess #endbullying #betransparent #stepup #leadersarentbullies #metoomovement #innerpeace #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #healthyworkplaces #metoo #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct Collusion between workplace bullies, executives, Federal Courts, Politicians, and Law Enforcement Agencies corrupts.  Employees may perceive their employer, with its inappropriate ties to respective governmental institutions and officials, complicit in failing to protect employees and their civil and constitutional rights.

"It is our attitude at the beginning of a difficult task which, more than anything else, will affect its successful outcome." - William James "Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm." - Winston Churchill "If everyone is moving forward together, then success takes care of itself." - Henry Ford

"The world is not fair, and often fools, cowards, liars and the selfish hide in high places." - Bryant H. McGill "To sin by silence, when we should protest, Makes cowards out of (us)." - Ella Wheeler Wilcox #endbullying #BeTransparent #stepup #metoo #leadersarentbullies #metoomovement #healthyworkplaces #InnerPeace #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

"Frivolous lawsuits are booming in this county. The U.S. has more costs of litigation per person than any other industrialized nation in the world, and it is crippling our economy." - Jack Kingston After more than four years of unusual RI federal court delays and conflicting decisions, Toray Plastics America dismissed their case against me and my book, with prejudice, and paid my requisite and extensive legal fees. I signed nothing.   It was all a waste of time.  For a firm like Toray Industries, headquartered in Japan, where corporations never sue individuals and where lawsuits are viewed with disdain, it was also shocking.   The delay intended to interrupt my book's marketing and sales momentum, but mobilized me to finish my second book, on helping readers transcend childhood and interpersonal trauma and abuse.  It's a shame individuals, like those at Toray Plastics America, can hide behind, and sue in the name of, corporations without being fined or pena...

"To be silent is to be complicit." - Richard Edelman #endbullying #betransparent #leadersarentbullies #stepup #healthyworkplaces #innerpeace #metoomovement #metoo #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Repeated bullying only occurs in organizations that tolerate bullying behavior. Harassment, abuse, and bullying at work cannot occur without the direct or indirect agreement and condoning of senior management.

"If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader." -John Quincy Adams "A great person attracts great people and knows how to hold them together." -Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe “Leadership is the art of giving people a platform for spreading ideas that work." -Seth Godin "A leader is best when people barely know he exists. When his work is done, his aim fulfilled, they will say: we did it ourselves." -Lao Tzu

"We must take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented." - Elie Wiesel "In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." - Martin Luther King, Jr. #endbullying #BeTransparent #innerpeace #leadersarentbullies #stepup #metoo #healthyworkenvironments #metoomovement #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact  

"Goliath was a champion, a monster who had never been beaten, and then this young guy, David, came forward, a child who believed in God and did it." - Tyson Fury "Everybody pulls for David, nobody roots for Goliath." - Wilt Chamberlain "The collusion of big business, big labor, and big government threaten the spirit of small business that makes America great." - Foster Friess

“Leaders who practice favoritism in the workplace have no chance to build a culture of trust.” — Robert Whipple “Favoritism and nepotism always prevail in the purlieus of these establishments. Incompetent persons are  admitted, to the exclusion of the worthy.” — Herman Melville #endbullying #BeTransparent #innerpeace #leadersarentbullies #metoomovement #metoo #StepUp #healthyworkenvironments #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact When a bully is a rainmaker or family member or adds a valued metric to an organization, the respective anti-bullying protocol and consequences may fall by the wayside and targets become scapegoats. This reinforces and rewards the bully’s offensive and despicable behaviors. 

"Coming together is a beginning. Keeping together is progress. Working together is success". - Henry Ford "You're Only as Good as Your Team! For the great achiever, it's all about “me.” For the great leader, it's all about “them” - Marshall Goldsmith "Leaders who seek only power and control, will end up Losing Both" - Dr. Henry Cloud

"People who feel inadequate, insecure, or overly dependent are scarred by childhood trauma and tend to be more jealous than others." - Helen Fisher "When you see something that is not right, not fair, not just, you have to speak up. You have to say something; you have to do something." - John Lewis #leadersarentbullies #BeTransparent #endbullying #innerpeace #stepup #metoo #healthyworkenvironments #metoomovement #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact  

Thank you all Veterans for protecting and preserving our Great American Freedoms, and, in particular, thanks to my Grandfather Edmund Bowen (WWI Army Combat), my Godfather Joseph Salvest (WWII Army Combat), my Father William Paknis (United States Army) and my High School Football Coach Ted Monica (Korean War Marine Combat).

"If you accept the expectations of others, especially negative ones, then you never will change the outcome." - Michael Jordan #leadersarentbullies #metoo #betransparent #stepup #endbullying #metoomovement #healthyworkenvironments #innerpeace #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact A poorly selected, managed, and trained supervisor may also bully due to intense and unrealistic performance expectations and stress.  These power mechanisms, to control someone with unreasonable performance objectives, may not be perceived as traditional, berating and belittling, bullying, but, just like bullying, unrealistic expectations are used to control a target.

"The people have spoken. Their decision is sovereign. We all respect it... I wish good luck to those who will now govern (The USA)." - Alain Juppe "If the people cannot trust their government to do the job for which it exists - to protect them and to promote their common welfare - all else is lost." - Barack Obama "Government's first duty is to protect the people, not run their lives." - Ronald Reagan "I never considered a difference of opinion in politics, in religion, in philosophy, as cause for withdrawing from a friend." - Thomas Jefferson With Trump's re-election, my plan is to continue posting his picture with my book cover, to acknowledge his bullying behaviors if they continue and to recognize his leadership when worthy (and to promote my book and platform fighting bullying, and to secure a publisher.)   My publisher signed over the rights of my book to me in 2019 after Toray Plastics America aligned with colluding RI Federal Cour...

"The superior (person) blames (themself). The inferior (person) blames others." - Don Shula "To build may have to be the slow and laborious task of years. To destroy can be the thoughtless act of a single day." - Winston Churchill "Any jackass can kick down a barn, but it takes a good carpenter to build one." - Sam Rayburn #leadersarentbullies #metoomovement #endbullying #peaceofmind #stepup #metoo #healthyworkenvironments #BeTransparent #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact  

"The freedom to criticize judges and other public officials is necessary to a vibrant democracy. The problem comes when healthy criticism is replaced with more destructive intimidation and sanctions." - Sandra Day O'Connor Below please find my response to a friend and colleague who had a personal encounter with Federal Judge William E. Smith.  My friend asked me about Smith's actions and decisions during Toray Plastics' America's lawsuit against me.   Following please find the facts of my professional legal experiences with RI Federal Court Judge Smith and Magistrate Patricia A. Sullivan.   Facts: In March 2023 Toray dismissed my case, with prejudice, and paid my considerable legal bills. I signed nothing. This suggests they admitted the case was frivolous and neither Toray or Smith wanted the case to be heard in public.  Toray dismissed 51 months after filing the lawsuit in December 2018.  Normal federal court filing to hearing time is 12 to 14 months...

"Education in the key to preventing the cycle of violence and hatred that marred the 20th century from repeating itself in the 21st century." - Elie Wiesel "Violence will only increase the cycle of violence." - Dalai Lama #endbullying #betransparent #stepup #metoo #peaceofmind #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkenvironments #metoomovement #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Being bullied and berated at work may lead a target to repeat the abuse cycle if a victim lacks self awareness and the character to stop the abuse. If an abused victim of workplace bullying supervises others, these employees may become targets. The chain of abuse initiated several levels above front-line workers lands on their shoulders. They, in turn, may direct the rage at people they come across in their homes, in public, towards their friends, pets, etc.

"Democracy cannot succeed unless those who express their choice are prepared to choose wisely. The real safeguard of democracy, therefore, is education." - Franklin D. Roosevelt "Leadership is not about the next election, it's about the next generation." - Simon Sinek "It's not the voting that's democracy; it's the counting." - Tom Stoppard

"First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win." - Mahatma Gandhi "The happiness of one's own heart alone cannot satisfy the soul; one must try to include, as necessary to one's own happiness, the happiness of others." - Paramahansa Yogananda #endbullying #BeTransparent #metoo #stepup #leadersarentbullies #innerpeace #healthyworkenvironments #metoomovement #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

"The freedom to criticize judges and other public officials is necessary to a vibrant democracy. The problem comes when healthy criticism is replaced with more destructive intimidation and sanctions." - Sandra Day O'Connor Below please find my response to a friend and colleague who had a personal encounter with Federal Judge William E. Smith.  My friend asked me about Smith's actions and decisions during Toray Plastics' America's lawsuit against me.   Following please find the facts of my professional legal experiences with RI Federal Court Judge Smith and Magistrate Patricia A. Sullivan.   Facts: In March 2023 Toray dismissed my case, with prejudice, and paid my considerable legal bills. I signed nothing. This suggests they admitted the case was frivolous and neither Toray or Smith wanted the case to be heard in public.  Toray dismissed 51 months after filing the lawsuit in December 2018.  Normal federal court filing to hearing time is 12 to 14 months...

"When autumn darkness falls, what we will remember are the small acts of kindness: a cake, a hug, an invitation to talk, and every single rose. These are all expressions of a nation coming together and caring about its people." - Jens Stoltenberg #endbullying #betransparent #stepup #metoo #leadersarentbullies #metoomovement #healthyworkenvironments #innerpeace #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Social inclusion—belonging to a group—is a fundamental human need. When coworkers are driven to ostracize one or more of their own, they are cutting out part of their own soul.

Unify and Elevate America "And just as the terrorist seeks to divide humanity in hate, so we have to unify it around an idea. And that idea is liberty." -Tony Blair "It's an honor to have the opportunity and platform to elevate my country and inspire and empower my people." - Koffee

"The freedom to criticize judges and other public officials is necessary to a vibrant democracy. The problem comes when healthy criticism is replaced with more destructive intimidation and sanctions." - Sandra Day O'Connor "One of the most sincere forms of respect is actually listening to what another has to say." - Bryant H. McGill #endbullying #BeTransparent #stepup #metoo #healthyworkenvironments #innerpeace #leadersarentbullies #metoomovement #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact