Matt Paknis Leadership Development

"When threatened / trapped, the organism reverts to a more primitive way to survive: fight or flight. If this fails, the organism tries to preserve itself by shutting down and expending as little energy as possible, in a state of freeze or collapse." - Bessel van der Kolk #live #PTSD #freedom #LifeIsShort #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #twisted #fearless #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #maturity #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct Bullying fear is like throwing sand in the engine of work. It immobilizes and freezes bystanders. Afraid to act, workers are less productive, yet poor production is the opposite of what bullies claim to demand, profess, and covet.

“To contract new debts is not the way to pay old ones.” - George Washington "Money was never a big motivation for me, except as a way to keep score. The real excitement is playing the game." - Donald Trump “Never spend your money before you have earned it.” - Thomas Jefferson #wealth #balance #fiscal #capitalism #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #power

"(Bullies) are afraid of things they don't understand. They don't know how to relate (talent, goodness, decency). It threatens their security, their existence, their career, image." - Bill Laswell "(Bullies) who feel inadequate, insecure, or overly dependent tend to be more jealous than (and are more apt to attack) others." - Helen Fisher "Whatever triggers you reveals what still needs to be healed, (to stop bullying)." - Tamara Kulish. #competence #confidence #maturity #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #calm  

"A corrupt judge does not carefully search for the truth." - Horace "Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere." - Martin Luther King Jr. "Judges are the weakest link in our system of justice, and they are also the most protected." - Alan Dershowitz #justice #truth #FreeSpeech #freedom #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

"(Those) who passively accept evil are as much involved in it as (those) who help to perpetrate it. (Those) who accept evil without protesting against it are really cooperating with it." - Martin Luther King, Jr. #SpeakUp #protection #intervention #truthtopower #leadersarentbullies #fightthepower #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact People who fail to intervene are afraid. They fear being the next target. They fear they might not help correctly and botch it. They fear to be the only ones to act. They fear retaliation and retribution by the bully or their employer. They fear losing their jobs and income.

"It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues." - Abraham Lincoln "It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit." - Harry S Truman "Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent." - Calvin Coolidge #persistence #Resilience #determination #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

"(People) can fail many times, but (they aren't) failures until (they) begin to blame somebody else." - John Burroughs "All cruelty springs from weakness." - Lucius Annaeus Seneca "Let us not seek the Republican answer or the Democratic answer, but the right answer. Let us not seek to fix the blame for the past. Let us accept our own responsibility for the future." - John F. Kennedy #encourage #improve #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #feedback #growth #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

"If the freedom of speech is taken away then dumb and silent we may be led, like sheep to the slaughter." - George Washington "Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself." - Harvey Fierstein #freedom #Efficacy #pushback #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #SpeakUp

We can do better than 13%! "When you do nothing you feel overwhelmed and powerless. But when you get involved you feel the sense of hope and accomplishment that comes from knowing you are working to make things better." - Maya Angelou #stepup #getinvolved   #protection   #helpingothers #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #SpeakUp #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Coworkers collaborate and rally around their bullied coworker by confronting the bully and reporting the bully’s abusive behaviors to their employer or authorities in about 13% of workplace bullying cases according to a WBI U.S. Workplace Bullying Survey.

"Power is like being a lady... if you have to tell people you are, you aren't." - Margaret Thatcher "Power is of two kinds. One is obtained by the fear of punishment and the other by acts of love." - Mahatma Gandhi #winwin #multisum #collaborate #rational #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

“Silent treatment in a relationship is often a sign of selfishness and weakness!” — Malbro Kingston "You can love people without leading them but you cannot lead people without loving them." - Ty Bennett #inclusion #invite #welcome #valueothers #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

"Justice consists not in being neutral between right and wrong, but in finding out the right and upholding it, wherever found, against the wrong." - Theodore Roosevelt "A judge must be free from all influences that might warp or sway her judgment." - Alexander Hamilton #failuretorecuse #ConflictOfInterest #Corruption #maliciousprosecution #TortiousInterference #frivolouslawsuits #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

"Surround yourself with only people who are going to lift you higher." - Oprah Winfrey “Remove toxic people from your life, & free up space for positive, healthy relationships.” - John Mark Green "Working with talented people  elevates, it feels more like play." - Jenna Ortega #positive #healthy #happy #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Controlling bullies will attempt block transfers to a safe job and to a good boss. They try to make targets so miserable that they quit, or try to impair a target’s health to the extent they must quit lifting the enormous burden of stress.

“We'll do what is best for the people and let politics take care of themselves.” - Ronald Reagan “The purpose of government is the care of human life and happiness, and not their destruction, is the first and only object of good government.” - Thomas Jefferson #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #FreeSpeech

A Most Happy and Safe 4th of July to You and Yours!  Let Freedom Ring! 

"There cannot be greater rudeness than to interrupt another in the current of his discourse." - John Locke “People intimidate only because they are intimidated by your goals.” - Janna Cachola “To say that a person feels listened to means a lot more than just their ideas get heard. It's a sign of respect. It makes people feel valued.” — Deborah Tannen “Of all the skills of leadership, listening is the most valuable — to get word before anyone of unseen problems and opportunities.” — Peter Nulty #listening #Respect #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #FreeSpeech #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

"A corrupt judiciary is hardly likely to hold a corrupt executive to account." - Prashant Bhushan #lawsuitsasweapons #maliciousprosecution #TortiousInterference #corruption #collusion #complicity #leadersarentbullies #justice #HealthyWorkplaces #truth #FreeSpeech  #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

"If you accept others' negative expectations, you'll never change the outcome." - Michael Jordan “Employees engage with employers when treated as respected, worthy humans.” - Meghan M. Biro “Treat your employees as you want them to treat your best customers.” - Stephen R. Covey #pygmalion #expectations #outcomes #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Bullied workers often admit they do the bare minimum. “I do just enough to not get fired, and nothing else,” says one abused and disengaged worker.

"The oldest & strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest & strongest kind of fear is fear of the unknown." - H. P. Lovecraft "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." - Franklin D. Roosevelt "Thinking will not overcome fear but action will." - W. Clement Stone #mindovermatter #risk #believeinyourself #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #dream A bully incites fear to control and manipulate workers and to undermine their sense of job security. Regions suffering from weak economies are vulnerable to bullying management practices.

"Without forgiveness life is governed by... an endless cycle of resentment and retaliation." - Roberto Assagioli "Revenge and retaliation always perpetuate the cycle of anger, fear and violence." - Coretta Scott King #collaboration #teamwork #listening #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #truth

"You can fool all the people some of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time." -Abraham Lincoln "Leadership is getting players to believe in you. If you tell a teammate you're ready to play as tough as you're able to, you'd better go out there and do it. Players will see right through a phony. And they can tell when you're not giving it all you've got." - Larry Bird #truth #original #transparent #authenticity #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

"When people can get away with crimes just because they are wealthy or have the right connections, the scales are tipped against fairness and equality. The weight of corruption then becomes so heavy that it creates a dent that forces the world to become slanted, so much so — that justice just slips off." - Suzy Kassem #frivolouslawsuits #maliciousprosecution #tortiousinterference #Justice #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

Had a blast this year! In addition to management and leadership consulting, I taught digital film production, 3D design manufacturing, and boat building, and the end products didn't sink!  Thank you New Bedford High School! "Being on a boat that's moving through the water, it's so clear. Everything falls into place in terms of what's important and what's not." - James Taylor #teaching #consulting #speaking #writing

"Peace is not the absence of conflict, it is the ability to handle conflict by peaceful means." - Ronald Reagan "Make them believe, that offensive operations, oftentimes, is the surest, if not the only (in some cases) means of defense”. - George Washington "Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable." - John F. Kennedy #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #peace

"You can only protect your liberties in this world by protecting the other man's freedom." - Clarence Darrow "Where you see wrong or inequality or injustice, speak out, because this is your country. This is your democracy. Make it. Protect it. Pass it on." - Thurgood Marshall We all have something deep within us that we can reach down and find the inner strength to get through difficulties." - Alana Stewart #leadersarentbullies #BrothersKeeper #HealthyWorkplaces #justice #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

"If you object to unfair treatment, you're an ingrate.  If you seek equity and fair consideration, you're uppity.  If you demand union security, you're un-American.  If you rebel against repressive management tactics, they will lynch and scalp you.  But if you are passive and patient, they will take advantage of both." — Congressman William Clay, Sr. "I have no intention of representing those powerful interests who walk over powerless people." — Congressman William Clay, Sr. #frivolouslawsuits #maliciousprosecution #TortiousInterference #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #justice #power #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact  

"You win more flies with honey than with vinegar." - Proverb "People work for money but go the extra mile for recognition, praise and rewards." - Dale Carnegie "Brains, like hearts, go where they are appreciated." -Robert McNamara #leadersarentbullies #hwalthyworkplaces #metoo #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #praise #Recognition #appreciationpost Bullies believe their negative behaviors motivate people to improve performance, as may be reflected in short-term results. Bullies don’t comprehend the long-term destructive consequences their abuse has on worker performance and attitude and, ultimately, on their organizations.

"If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more, and become more, then you are a leader.” —John Quincy Adams “No person was ever honored for what he received. Honor has been the reward for what he gave.” ― Calvin Coolidge #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #inspire

 "People need to know that leaders are doing everything possible to remove barriers that hamper their doing the “right” things." - Lori Ludwig

“Without strong watchdog institutions, impunity becomes the very foundation upon which systems of corruption are built. And if impunity is not demolished, all efforts to bring an end to corruption are in vain. “ — Rigoberta Menchú “People’s indifference is the best breeding ground for corruption to grow” — Delia Ferreira #Frivolous #complicity #maliciousprosecution #TortiousInterference #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #accountability #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

"The principle I believe contributed more than any other to building our current thriving business, is our company's employees taking ownership and accountability for its success." - James E. Casey "There is no more dreadful punishment than futile and hopeless labor." - Albert Camus #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #ownership, #accountability #engagement #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact  Workers may lose their desire to do good work when “it doesn’t matter.” They realize they will be abused regardless of how well they work, or perform. When workers sense they have no control over their performance outcomes, job ownership, accountability, and motivation cease.

"Folks are usually about as happy as they make their minds up to be." - Abraham Lincoln "The best way to predict your future is to create it." - Abraham Lincoln #leadersarentbullies #efficacy #choices  #HealthyWorkplaces #happiness #peace #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #transparency

  "Overcoming (ACEs) involves recognizing the impact of past traumas on current well-being and actively working to build resilience and develop healthy coping mechanisms. This includes seeking support, building strong relationships, practicing self-care, and engaging in therapy or other mental health interventions." - Mayo Clinic #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplaces #resiliency #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct

   

"Nothing else can quite substitute for a few well-chosen, well-timed, sincere words of praise. They're absolutely free and worth a fortune." - Sam Walton #praise #recognition #expectations #Pygmalion #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplaces #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct Individuals want to avoid repeated negative workplace bullying events, so they try to correct their performance after being berated, but an abusive bully uses criticism to control and never praises.

"Peace is not the absence of conflict, it is the ability to handle conflict by peaceful means." - Ronald Reagan "Peace cannot be kept by force; it can only be achieved by understanding." - Albert Einstein "If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other." - Mother Teresa #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplace #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #peace #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

 

"Kindness is more important than wisdom, and the recognition of this is the beginning of wisdom." - Theodore Isaac Rubin "Recognition is a reward in itself. Any form of appreciation, even a small word, is important." - Vikrant Massey "People may take a job for more money, but they often leave it for more recognition." - Bob Nelson #leadersarentbullies #HealthyWorkplace #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact #recognition #kindness #grit

What entitles a corporation, on false grounds, the privilege to sue an author and to tie them up in federal court for five years and to violate their freedom of speech? A.  The corporation's attorney clerked for one of the respective Federal Justices.  B.  The corporation colludes with all the Justices on the case.  C. The corporation wants to bring itself into the public domain so the plaintiff can write about them at will.  D.  The corporation is angry and vindictive and is allowed. E.  US corporations have more freedoms than US individuals.   F.  The Federal Justices were former law partners and are accustomed to teaming up to screw their legal opponents.  "People who are given whatever they want soon develop a sense of entitlement and rapidly lose their sense of proportion." - Sarah Churchwell

"The paradox of trauma is it has both the power to destroy and the power to transform and resurrect." - Peter A. Levine "Traumatized people can offer gifts - in their depth, their grasp of universal vulnerability, and their  power of experiencing compassion." - Sharon Salzberg #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplace #LightBeatsDarkness #transcend #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Workers recall and re-experience negative events with intense emotions. In a bullying work environment, where there is a pattern of unremitting interactions, negativity threatens and damages performance and can even destroy organizations, careers, and people.

 

“The safety of the people shall be the highest law." – Marcus Tullius Cicero “Safety applies with equal force to the individual, to the family, to the employer, to the state, the nation and to international affairs. Safety, in its widest sense, concerns the happiness, contentment and freedom of mankind." – William M. Jeffers Who is most responsible for the safety of workers in the USA? A. Occupational Safety & Healthy Administrators B.  Employers C.  Employees D.  Local Law Enforcement E.  Elected officials F.  Journalists

"Most bad behavior comes from insecurity." - Debra Winger Who is more apt to feel inadequate and insecure? A. Democrats B. Republicans C. Both D.  Neither E.  America's elected officials are vetted to assure all are competent and confident. #leadersarentbullies

"Trust is the glue of life. It's the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It's the foundational principle that holds all relationships." - Stephen Covey #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplace #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact Company leaders who believe bullying behavior influences real or perceived positive worker performance outcomes, and, in turn, organizational benefits are misguided and delusional. #LeadersArentBullies

"In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing." - Theodore Roosevelt "If you live long enough, you'll make mistakes. But if you learn from them, you'll be a better person. It's how you handle adversity, not how it affects you. The main thing is never quit, never quit, never quit." - William J. Clinton #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplace #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact

"A lawsuit can be a weapon." - Bari Weiss "A R.I. U.S. District Court judge determined Toray Plastics America could bring non disparagement and defamation claims against former employee, Matthew Paknis, who wrote a book on workplace bullying, even though the book never referenced the employer by name." - RI Lawyers Weekly, August, 2022. Toray's case against me was dismissed, with prejudice, in March 2023, fifty one months after being filed. I signed nothing.  The judge who claimed the case had merit to be heard by a jury refused to let it go to court.  So, I did not get my day in court or my opportunity to share the truth or to generate more awareness for workplace bullying.   I am innocent.  No common reader can identify Toray in my book.  Toray wanted to harm me for perceived wrongs and USED THE US FEDERAL COURT SYSTEM TO BULLY ME by enlisting two complicit former law partners, and current RI Federal Justices, one for whom Toray's counsel had clerked, to ...

"I hope we shall crush in its birth the aristocracy of our monied corporations which dare already to challenge our government to a trial by strength, and bid defiance to the laws of our country." - Thomas Jefferson "No individual or company, no matter how large or how profitable, is above the law." - Eric Holder #frivolouslawsuits #maliciousprosecution #tortiousinterference #collusion #complicity #Corruption #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplace #transparency #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct

"Destiny is no matter of chance. It is a matter of choice. It is not a thing to wait for, it is a thing to be achieved." - William Jennings Bryan "You don't have control over your situation. But you have a choice about how you view it." - Chris Pine #choice #leadersarentbullies #healthyworkplace #protection   #leaderselevatethoughtandconduct #psychologicalsafetyatworkact In bullying work environments, supervisors feel obligated to be on call 24 hrs/day, 7 days/week, as an extension of their bullying boss. There’s no time to ponder their contrived existence, to seek root causes and solutions, or to choose a normal, balanced, and healthy life.